Ownership & Legacy

Ownership is more than having something in your name—it’s about taking full responsibility for your vision, your voice, and your future. In this episode, I sit down with Najma, a dynamic entrepreneur, professor, and founder of Pink Walnut, a natural body bistro rooted in intention, wellness, and care.

We talk about what it really takes to build something that lasts, the power of starting and sustaining a business at any stage in life, and how faith, discipline, and alignment play a role in creating generational impact. Through her journey, Najma shares what it means to create a brand that not only serves people—but stands the test of time.

If you’ve been thinking about stepping into ownership—in your life, your finances, or your purpose—this episode is your reminder that it’s never too late to build something meaningful.

Transcript

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SPEAKER_00 0:01

Welcome back to the Fab Podcast, the space where we talk about faith, ambition, and building. We're talking about ownership and legacy, not just owning a business, but owning your knowledge, your voice, and your future. Today's guest is someone who has been a part of my journey long before Bellabu Lip Hop ever existed. We met my very first year at Morgan State University. She was my professor, and over the years she became my mentor, my big sister, and one of the people who believed in my vision before it was even fully formed. She is the founder of Pink Walnut, a natural body bistro rooted in wellness, self-care, and intention. She is also the woman who helped me formulate Bellabu lip pot from the ingredient sourcing to melting temperatures to packaging. She didn't just help me build a product, she helped me understand the science and power behind it. So today's conversation isn't just business, it's about what it means to build something that outlives you. So please welcome my friend, my mentor, and a true legacy builder, Najma. Welcome to the Fab family. Thank you. I'm so excited to be here and so excited for your podcast in general. Yeah, it's been a journey for sure. Um, so Najma, when you've been a part of my journey from the very beginning. What does it feel like to now see Bellabu becoming something real? Um I would say it's always uh exciting and I guess I don't want to even say exciting, not like jumping up and down. I've been thinking about Bellabu.

SPEAKER_02 1:48

I mean that's honest. That's very honest.

SPEAKER_00 1:51

Like, girl, I mean it's cute. But it is very it's satisfying, I think, anytime uh an idea, the whole thing of like I'm very sciencey, so the whole thing of turning an idea into something that's physical is the I the idea is is sort of spiritual in the realm of like something that you can't see, and then you're transitioning that into something that you actually can see, feel and touch. Yes, and so that process is um satisfying and is always like a little bit amazing, kind of like just watching life in general. Yeah, because life is life and it'd be ghetto.

unknown 2:40

Exactly.

SPEAKER_00 2:40

And we know how ghetto it can be. So yeah, so yeah, so that part of it, you know, it was an idea, and then all of a sudden, and then you get to see people like you told you could tell me, oh yeah, I have an idea, I want to have a business with my daughter, and I'm just thinking about trying to visualize what that looks like based on just hearing you say it, and I have my visuals that come up, but then when the person actually creates it, now you can actually see inside of them what they were talking about. Yeah. So from the small, you know, the label, the the logo, and you're like, okay, so you get to know a little bit more about a person every time they do that.

SPEAKER_02 3:26

That's cool.

SPEAKER_00 3:27

Very good. And so I like that part of creativity in general. That's the only way we know people. Because otherwise we're just imagining, you know, they're trying to you're trying to empathize, you're trying to like, you're like, I saw this and I thought it was good, and you have your own ideas that come from all your past, and you build this whole thing, but until they actually bring it forward, then you go like, okay, so that's what you call red. That actually looks purple to me, but okay. True. Yeah, it's a different way, I guess, of saying somebody's vision. Yeah. Yeah. Then maybe they exceeded that expectation. Yeah in a way. And just informed you in a way about something intimate inside themselves that you couldn't have seen in another way. I I've never maybe thought about creativity being something that's kind of sacred.

SPEAKER_01 4:18

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_00 4:18

I mean, spiritual, yes, but I don't know if I would have maybe said it was sacred in the way that you said it. I think that's kind of like a different perspective. And that's I think also, I mean, we don't I don't want to digress, but No, let's not grieve, but I mean I think it's really important as fellow humans on the planet. I'm learning, and I hate to say because you get older, because when you hear when you're young and you hear people say that, it always seems very aged. And so I would like to say that I'm young and I just got it, but with age comes just experience, and so I've learned to value that. And you could also just have it. Like we could sit down. Well, that is true, but I didn't have it when I was in my twenties. And I can't even see what you look like, but black don't pack. And uh this one over here is very wise. And don't look nowhere near close. That's yeah, actual age, but that's a podcast. Right. That whole podcast of just women able to embrace, let's just say our age. Let's have a moment where we just say our ages and stuff. And be comfortable with that. Sitting on it. I'm gonna own that because I am turning another age this year. So I'm gonna I'm gonna So yeah, we should, yeah, we could I don't know if men have that issue, but for sure women do. But anyway, so yeah, so I so I think that so what going back to like the spiritual becoming the physical, and I think say that is like it's really just microscopic, because I mean we have energy that comes off of thoughts and things like that. It's energy that's actually real at a small, small, small, small tiny scale. But you know, it can be measured just like I always use the example of like the remote control that turns on the TV. That's actually something it's energy that's happening, you can't see it, but it is the energy that's happening, so it's not like it's any less real because you can't see it. But um taking it into the physical where we can see with our eyes, our visual spectrum. Um, I think that when people do that in every aspect, it is a part of them. So the reason why I said sacred is because it's a part of who you are, and a lot of times we tend to criticize, you know, we we we are judgmental because we're like, oh, like if I had said, oh, I had no idea. You said better, right? But sometimes maybe it's not. Maybe you're like, oh, I thought you would have come up with something. That's what you're thinking, you know. Like I thought you would have come up some with something better. Not that I thought that I didn't think that about Bellevue, but I was like, you could, and sometimes we say those things, especially to like people we love, because we want them to like reach these expectations that we have of ourselves, of of ourselves and then people that we care about that are extensions of ourselves, and we see them like if you do good, I do good. You know what I mean? If you look good, I look good. And so I think we forget that when someone creates something in their head, we need to like honor it, we need to like say, before we start to say, well, you know, you could have trimmed this corner a little bit better, you could be and maybe they didn't ask you, you know what I mean? Even that. Yeah. And that'd be the same. It's beautiful. We need to say, we need to look at it as like as an exploratory, like, oh, okay, this is how you're feeling, this is how and honor that because when you start to judge it, then that's when the walls come up, and then they try to defend, you know. And then they won't tell you, you know, they won't be open to you. So I have definitely learned that um in my aging. I say that's why I call it sacred. Like everything that someone does that they bring forward is them telling you a little bit about something intimate inside of them. That's how the that's the only way we can see it physically. And that's challenging. That's beautiful. Especially when it's your kid and you're like, what? But you know. But it's actually the I feel like that's like the foundation of creativity because sometimes you have creative ideas, um, and some people just sit on them. And they never you you never hear about it, they never share it, never come to fruition, and then they may have that one chance where they're like, you know, I probably should have did this. Um and I think maybe having an understanding of why somebody wants to do something creatively and what that means to them. But like when I came to you with my with my idea, you didn't say, Well, that's crazy, or why do you want to do that? Pretty much like how can you help? Um, and I think having that kind of foundation um and that level of support really just further pushes you to really like step into that creative space of like, oh, okay, I can do this. You know? So thank you for that. You're welcome. Yeah. And I think we should also, I mean, just because I think about children, you see little when you see small children, they're not afraid to do anything. And then at some point we get scared to do that. But I think that goes back to like creativity. And it's not like we accept everything, you know what I mean? Like you're acting like you know an asshole then at some point. But if that's what's inside of somebody, then we first need to examine and be like, okay, what's going on? What's going on, you know? So yeah. So that people can express, you know, they can feel safe because they sit on like you said, they sit on an idea because they they feel like they're gonna be judged. Well, they are gonna be judged, it doesn't matter. And not having maybe that support or that safe space to kind of like figure out yeah, make mistakes too.

SPEAKER_01 10:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 10:16

Absolutely. Mm-hmm. So Najman, you have built Pink Walnut from the ground up. What did ownership mean to you when you first started, and how was that definition how has that definition evolved over the years? Um I think uh well for sure ownership for me just means having some sort of uh I want to say control or management of my space. And that goes to like not being a victim. Uh so whether it be finances or it's not so much finances, I mean it is finances, but I would say like that was probably not the focal point, but just for me it was like health and just not being at the receiver end of everything in life, um, and feeling like I have some I well not even feeling like knowing that I can manipulate my environment the way I want to manipulate my environment. And not being just because you look around and there's lanes that we walk in, you know, there's roads, there's you know, homes that are built, there's jobs that companies that we apply to jobs for. So I always would be thinking, and it could be, I mean, for sure, it's probably nurtured because I had a family business when I was growing up. I don't know. I worked in a family business, yeah. So a lot of that was nurtured, but uh just the feeling of like I can, just like anybody else can. The big tall I mean, I I literally could walk down streets and look at tall buildings and think, you know, somebody had an idea, somebody with just the same faculty, the same 24 hours in a day, and they decided to do this, and now it's something that everybody needs, that everybody can't imagine living without, you know, and so a lot of times we feel like we're on the we're on just the like I said, the receiving end of that, and we have to do certain things because you know we have to pay attention to the red light camera, and we and you know, obviously it's safer, but those were only people that came up with that. And so everybody has the opportunity to build that space where people then gather or and you're just not the person that just has to be the consumer. You can be the creator too. And if you think things are not fair or just or healthy, then do something about it. And then a lot of times we don't feel like we because everything's just so big and the industry is so large, I think we lose sight of just the small little step that it takes to get there, and it starts with an idea. And then just driving that idea forward, having dedication and commitment and failing, and it's like the hundred-year plan, like some people say, like it may not be I don't know if they think about, and when I say they, I mean those people that might create the infrastructure that we live in, but they don't necessarily think about because I've heard I've read things like it might not happen in my lifetime, but this is I have a a plan of longevity that exceeds possibly my lifetime. Well, most likely, yeah, for sure. I'm trying to create a lane. So it's not just about ownership for you, it's about ownership and a legacy. Yes, and a legacy, and just putting down the space that if you can't find it in this in the environment that you're in, then you can create it. I like that. So maybe not just seeing what is around you, but realizing like that it's not the NLB all. That you can kind of create your own environment in your own lane. Mm-hmm. And then from there, that's kind of where your ownership becomes people. Yeah. Ooh, I like it. Yeah. But I think we we feel weak a lot of times when we feel like we don't have it takes a lot of audacity. You know, like I would say Okay, audacity. That's the theme for people too. Have the audacity to believe that the desires of your heart are possible. Yes, and that takes a lot of like can you imagine? Like, people, just regular humans, do that, and it's not many. It isn't many. Most people just want to I don't want to think about it. Just tell me where to go. Tell me what to do, tell me what to do, and I don't want to think about it. Because you really just don't feel good enough, you don't feel powerful enough, you don't feel you know, but then at that point you're at the whim and at the subjugation of somebody else's idea. And that goes into even your if you nature is really indifferent. That's what I've learned, and from other people, the quantum field that they call like the energy that's out there is like you go into a store, and all the ingredients are there to make a hundred different things. That's always a pop- everything's a possibility, and it's neutral. It doesn't matter. You could be Hitler in the store, or you could be Mother Teresa in the store. And you have the option. That's what I I see the creator, just like, okay, it's the option. It's always there for everybody. Narrowing it down to like, okay, I want to make chocolate chip cookies and what the ingredients I'm gonna use to make that. That's your job. Now, if somebody else goes and you're like, you're just in there and everybody rushes, every you know, more people rush, and then you go there and there's no chocolate chips. Well, you can't blame the people who went in there and knew exactly what they were gonna do and knew exactly what they wanted to make. And when they got all the ingredients and you go there, well, there's none for me. Well, you just kind of stood there and you didn't know it's you didn't have a plan. Mm-hmm. And that could be in your relationship, like the other person, you're like, so it's like always like you don't you you can sit in like victimhood, but know that the other person is also playing that set game. And if they're better at it, even if they're making you do something you don't want to do, or you quote unquote, you know what I mean, your husband, your spouse, whatever, you're like, you're always, you know, well, they're just playing the game really well. If they're gotten you to like wheel and deal in their space, well, the energy is just yeah, they're just doing a really good job at it, and you need to learn from them. Like, how are they able to do that? Check me. Now you need to start doing that. And it's not a game in the sense that you're but it's like nature is just there for you. If you don't plant your seed, I don't care if you're the nicest person. You know, I always use like, you know, the scriptures say that the rain falls on the just and the unjust. If you don't get an umbrella, you're gonna get wet. Period. Get you a raincoat or rainbow. So a lot of people don't feel like they're like, well, I can't, you know, I don't know where to get the umbrella from. I don't they took all the umbrellas, you know what I mean? It's like one. Make one, figure something out. I like that. Yeah. Like not just being a product of your environment. Yeah. Realizing like you can create your own environment outside of that. That's deep. Yeah. It's hard, it's not easy. Oh, definitely. No, we ain't never saying it was easy. Yeah, it's not easy. Yeah, and you have to have like surety in yourself. Like you have to have so much confidence. The the universe requires you to stand, be confident, clear, concise, know who you are. Like, even if you've come from tragedy, it's like, okay, that's fine, but what are we doing? Mm-hmm. Very true. Very true. So do you feel like your definition of ownership has evolved over the years or no? I think it's just been more refined in terms of like refinement. I think that's always what I had in mind. But I've gotten more better language, better understanding of how to do that, how to accomplish that, and how to step up to the plate with that. And I'm not by no means do I feel like I'm an expert at it. Yeah, I guess maybe it's good it's good expertise. But I would say that you do, I do think we need to celebrate I always say celebrate our wins. Absolutely. And we need to because we always are we fall into like wanting to, maybe not everybody, but maybe it's yeah, maybe not everybody, but I think people generally easily will say what they are lacking. But what has worked, what have you learned and what has worked? And say that and produce, like people you can have an idea back to that. You can have an idea, and you can say, I think I can make this cake. I want to make a cake. Okay, let's see that. And then you make the cake and it doesn't turn out once we won't know what you can do until you make something. That's the other thing, too. No one knows an idea. We can we can sit here and talk about it and you know dance in that space, but until you do something, like it's not gonna be totally produced something. Yeah, and so when you make the cake and the cake doesn't, you know, falls in the middle or whatever, and you can say, Okay, but when you make that per when you do it over and over and you make that perfect cake, uh, then you need to say, that's the example. Like, I'm good at that. We have a hard time. I don't know if women have a hard time doing that. If men may, I don't know, we have talked about it. I mean I feel like people in general. Yeah, having but we'll easily say what we can't do, but we won't say, and the universe needs to know what can be done as well. Like, that's good. I did that, that turned out well. I worked at it. I why what is even just saying it now, just kind of like had to train myself to be able to be so you because if you they'll say you sound arrogant, you sound, you know, whatever. But if I know how to do something well and I've worked with that's I don't think that's arrogance, I feel like it's confidence because you've experienced something and you probably trial and error, and now you've gotten better at it. And I feel like that's kind of what ownership and entrepreneurship is about. It's like you're not going to succeed the very first time. But if you give up because you didn't get what you wanted the first time, then you have nothing. Then all of that, you got the idea for what? You have to keep going and keep learning. And you're gonna make mistakes, but those mistakes are gonna help you get to where you want to be. You definitely have to be consistent. And I think I think what you were maybe trying to say was like that looking for that external validation about if you're good enough or is this good enough or am I good enough? And I think that's a societal thing where we felt like we have to seek other people's validation for stuff that we already know within us. What it is.

SPEAKER_01 22:01

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_00 22:01

Like, I don't need somebody to tell me great that I'm great because I'm great because God said I was. Right. While I was being formed in my mom's womb, God knew I would be great. You know what I mean? So I think that we have to start going within and validating our own existence and our own greatness instead of, oh well, look at me, look at this. Because then when you don't hear what you want to hear, then it you're disappointed. And I just think that's society making us think like we need other people's approval for things that are already within us. And that serves. We have all the tools. And that serves us. And you can pick up some tools along the way. I ain't say that you got everything in life and figure out. But it's just certain things I feel like that are within us that are a part of our DNA and our makeup as a person, our characteristics. Um they already exude greatness. I mean, God don't waste his time on Lucy. Like what? Like, we're great because we're here and we have a chance.

unknown 23:10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 23:11

We're given a chance every day. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 23:13

Possibly the government we end with.

SPEAKER_00 23:14

So that's why I think everybody should and and like you said, the society is made that way because unfortunately, or whatever, the the powers that be have a vested interest in like you not knowing them. And so they want you to never figure it out. Right. But I feel like that's also what consumerness is built upon. Because it's like you have to look outwards and say, Oh, I need this particular dress to make me feel this way. And you may feel that way, but that's not a lasting feeling. You don't need a dress to tell you that you look beautiful or a dress to make you feel, you know, great. You are because God says you are. And I feel like those things are just extra on top of what you should already, you know, feel and know. But you know, consumerness makes the world go round if everyone makes their money. We just gotta eat. We just went with whatever. But I mean But it's all related. That's why I think everybody should have a business. Oh, I don't care what it is, like get in the business of doing business, get in the business of doing of create whatever comes to mind, like do it. Yeah, don't sleep on your creative idea. It's not like you have to go sell it, but it's like produce. I'm even talking to myself, like you know, produce because you even hesitate, like you said, the hesitation of like sitting on something, just do it. Because the universe is begging for that. Yeah, and and you'll get that support that you need once you step into that power of like okay, I can do this. Um and you and then honoring that and then recognizing it. And not saying, you know, people a lot of times I think even people saying, like, oh no, God bless me, you know what I mean? That's also outside of yourself. God bless you. I always go back to this. I don't know, I'm not trying to like push a a a theology on anybody, but I see I feel like based on what I've understood about the creator, he did what he did in six days.

SPEAKER_03 25:18

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 25:19

And then he was like, You take it from here. So I told my sister the other day I was talking to her, and we will say, Well, as if there was a magic wand on you that came down. No, I use the tools he gave me ten fingers, and maybe not ten fingers, but you know, whatever. I have ten fingers, I have ten toes, I have a brain, and I utilize the tools well, but I did that. He didn't come down here and do that. I utilized a tool that he created in six days, I did that. You did that, you utilize those tools well, because you could have used those tools to steal from somebody, and many people do. You know what I mean? They do, and they did that. But I'm saying you can use them either way. So when you do something good, don't even I I don't want to say, and maybe this sounds a little controversial, but don't even just wait. You can thank God, right? But I think a lot of times we lean on that outside to remove us from the I thing that I did that. Like we need to sit in the I did that more, not even the religious God blessed me and I did that. You know what I mean? That's still removing, I think. And and those little things are the things where we can't sit in the space of saying, I'm good at this, I created this, I put something good on the planet, I did that. You know what I mean? And I don't think it's like not really giving God his credit because God does a lot. But that they have that same uh faith without work is dead. Yeah. You can say God provide every day, but if you don't give up to participate in God providing, you're not gonna have nothing. So we still have to do the work, and it's still because I feel like if you're not honoring God, then you ain't honoring yourself.

SPEAKER_01 27:03

Right.

SPEAKER_00 27:04

So if you want God to provide, honoring God would be you participating in the process of you being provided for, not you just sit and wait for God's. He already provides because he's here, he's giving us everything that we need. So it's like you have to put action behind that. Sometimes people do abuse themselves. Well, God's gonna provide. He already providing every day, right? He's giving you an opportunity, he's waking you up, right? You're healthy, you're able and available to do a lot of things, but you can't just sit and wait. Like, that's not how it works. But then on the other side, they'll be like, if you do something bad, can you say God did that too? But I don't necessarily believe like it it's bad and it's unfortunate, but I feel like sometimes God uses those type of lessons to reach us because we're missing whatever message he's trying to get to us because we're human. That's the human enough. We think that we're in control. So it's like, yeah, I heard you die, but I'm still gonna do this. And God's like, I definitely didn't tell you to do that. Now you're here in this bad situation and you're calling him God. But I had already told you or tried to tell you that this wasn't the best. Right, right, right. Yeah. So Yeah, you just need to get out here and just do it. Yeah, so any of y'all out there with creative ideas, do your research, sh pray about it, but get out of there because you'll figure out as you go along. You will, right? Yeah. So, Najman, when you were helping me create vellable lip pie from temperatures to ingredients to packaging and helping me create my recipe, what made you so intentional about teaching instead of just doing it for me? Uh well, uh isn't something philosophical.

SPEAKER_02 29:01

I could be like philosophical, but I am problems. Right.

SPEAKER_00 29:07

And I don't think I came to you like wanting you to do it for me. I think I wanted to understand like I'm about to make something that somebody is putting on their body. And I wanted it to be, you know, as natural as possible, but I also wanted to understand um, you know, melting solid ingredients, yeah, adding liquid ingredients. You know, if you don't pour it fast enough and you let it sit, now the chapstick is crystallized. I want to know figure that out. So I think coming to you um and understanding what natural ingredients to use and how all of that works together was important. Because I could have just put some shit in the pot, melted it down, and then I'm here selling trash. But I that's not what I wanted. I wanted something, you know, again, that was gonna leave a legacy. Like I didn't want to just make anything. You know, this was something that I was creating with my daughter, you know what I mean? And so I felt like I need to be intentional about the ingredients that I'm using and what I'm using it for and how to use it. Um, so yeah, coming and I think because you were already a professor, if that's something that you already do in your business. I was like, well, let me go to the professionals. You know, so um you definitely were helpful with that. And it just I think it kind of just aligned things further for me, like to be intentional about what you're selling, who you're selling to, but also like you want to be proud of what you're selling. You're proud of you wanna be able to use it, you want to understand how it works, you know what I mean? So yeah, you definitely could have done it for me, but it definitely was like uh a course. I was like, oh, this is for real. Like, are you really being or mounting stuff down and whipping it up? Yeah, so I think if you had done it for me, I think it would have just took away from the reason I wanted to be an entrepreneur. Yeah. Because I wouldn't have gotten that knowledge. Yeah. Like, okay, this is what you need to do. No, I agree. And I was like, and I don't think like even you came to me for information that I would definitely will share. And I'm always looking for people who are aligned on my path in the sense of like not we're doing the exact same thing, but have the same thought process. And so we need each other in those spaces. It's not a lot of people who delve in those spaces, and like you said, you learned like, oh, okay, I go to the store and buy chapstick, but I didn't realize. Yeah, and I didn't realize the process that they're going through. I mean, so now you can look at a big manufacturing company of like, you know, I don't know, burst bees or whatever, and think, wow, they they are And they talk saying I cheap. It's not cheap. Yeah, because of everything they have to think about when they talk about like and they have a consistent product that comes out all the time. You don't so that's you can like let's bend the knee to that, you know, to that process. And now I understand that, and you're teaching your daughter that and and even those little things, it's like they probably don't even like, oh yeah, my mom, yeah, we have a business, you know. They kids will just be like, This is just the way I grew up, you know what I mean? But how that inter interfaces with their development is like priceless, yeah. That they can't even realize.

SPEAKER_03 32:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 32:30

The I can they're just like we just have an idea and we just go in the kitchen and we just like do you they will not even realize that until they'll realize it for sure, and I I don't know when, but at some point they'll realize like how valuable that is and how they're able to move freer around the space. Like I said, not being the victim, not being like I have to just take whatever. Or just accept whatever. I can go and I can source and I can and I can create myself. So yeah, that's priceless. That's absolutely well. It's really the bad. And I I wanted to say too that even though you came to me like Bella Boot is nothing of Najima, you know what I mean? It's all you. It's not like you can see my fingerprint on it. Like you wouldn't I mean you're definitely in there though. I know, but I'm saying you wouldn't see that. Like it's not I that's not me. Yeah. That's that's Adrian, you know what I mean, and and Bella. It's definitely that's you. No, it definitely is. I just think that, you know, in those beginning stages of bringing a creative idea to fruition, it's it's really um critical to having people around believing your vision and that will be. Because people won't be like, oh yeah, start a business. And then you'd be like, Well, girl, um, what wholesale company you use? Oh, I can't share that.

unknown 34:09

Right.

SPEAKER_02 34:10

Huh?

SPEAKER_00 34:11

Right. I just want me to start a business, you just don't want to help me for business or oh I get it, yeah. You know what I'm saying? So I've experienced that. So I think for me it's like to have someone be like, okay, well, what ingredients you're gonna use? And then suggest, you know, okay, well, if you use this, then you need to melt this down. You didn't have to do that, is what I'm saying. Yeah, yeah. But had you not done that, we would have had a lot of maybe would have never started my business. Oh, wow. You know what I mean? And I think sometimes we are going to go to the people that are closer to us that we feel safe and that we feel connected to for that support. Especially if you're someone where I see, like, okay, she has her pink walnut business. Like, it's a natural body bistro. So you know what you're doing. I know. But it's like I'm not gonna go to an outside source who's probably gonna take my money that I haven't really got. Yeah, yeah. You know what I'm saying? To help me formulate a recipe when I can go to someone who's doing it already in their own business. And that's disappointing if you go to that. You already have built up like, oh, this is somebody I can trust, it's somebody who's like her. Yeah, that's horrible. Yeah, that's horrible. I guess I didn't even think of that. Like, that's one of the things that your kids probably won't even realize how you learn. Yeah, I didn't even think of that because I already from doing that, like, and you'll learn that. You'll maybe you already know that, but no one does things the way you do them. Exactly. So it doesn't even matter. Like, I could give you all the same. My vanilla cake is not gonna be your vanilla cake. You know what I mean? It's gonna but our energy, that's a real thing. Yeah, it is. But I put into something my thoughts, my intentions, all of that, it's a real thing. So that's why I said no. We do. Um, but I think the importance of having this conversation is for people to understand the importance of having people around you who believe in your vision and who are willing to help you see your vision through and not feel like it's taking away from whatever they're doing. So I want to give you your flowers and let you sit in that. Because had you not taken the time out of your schedule to be like, hey, come to my shop, I can show you how to melt stuff down. You know, if you don't do this fast enough, the chapstick is gonna crystallize, it's gonna dry it out, it's gonna be moved and move. Um, and it has happened because I have made batches of chapstick and I was like, yeah, I have overheated this. Yeah. And now it has this weird texture. And it's not supposed to have a weird texture, it's supposed to be smooth. So I feel like had I not had gotten that one-on-one from you, I don't even know if Bella Boo would have become Bella Boo. It might have just been a creative idea.

SPEAKER_01 37:12

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 37:13

So thank you for not gatekeeping. Thank you for your support. Thank you for sharing your vendors and whatnot, and teaching me like, if you're gonna do this, let's do it correctly correctly, you know. Because you was like, Do you have a recipe? And I was like, but I'm like, don't have to melt something down. He was like, Yeah, you do, but you know what I mean? You literally walked me through that and was like, okay, this is what you do. She even gave me a miniature crockpot, guys. And I used that when I started.

SPEAKER_02 37:45

Oh my god, thank you for reminding me. Because I was like, I had yesterday. And I was like, there's the box. What happened to that?

SPEAKER_00 38:00

Do you know that I thought I was like, I literally turned the whole thing around. And I thought you gave me the miniature cropped. I was like, Adrian gave me a miniature. I had no idea. No, it wasn't. Okay, so you have it. Yeah, because he was like, Well, you're gonna need to melt your stuff down, you want you can use this. She even told me like what type of um tools to get for like what I melt my stuff down and what worked and what yeah.

unknown 38:37

Thank you.

SPEAKER_00 38:37

And we didn't really, I mean, to be honest, and I I was just thinking as we were talking about it, like a lot of times we say, like, women need to support women, and it's a tagline, it's a t-shirt thing, you know what I mean? Like, I think maybe a lot of it is insincere, and people just do it for the for the clicks. Maybe that's what it is, you know what I mean? Not really sincerely wanting to like share like my your manufacturer, like your they just kind of like say, yeah, we have to like support each other, and we have to be. And I think people say a lot of things, but they don't really mean that. I think for me, it wasn't you just saying that, yeah, but it was you actively being like, okay, this is what it is. You know what I mean? And I still had questions even after that. You know, I was like, and you was like, Well, what did you put it on? You checked the temperature. Like, I could actively be like ask you a random question about something. And you weren't like, I don't have time, I don't know what you're talking about. Girl, I have my own business, I'm posting it up, like I what what are you talking about?

unknown 39:39

Like figure it out.

SPEAKER_00 39:40

You were very much like, oh no, like call me, let's talk about it later, like let's figure it out. Like, come to my shop. So I feel like that is not a I don't want to say it's not normal because I think it is normal, but I also think it's very rare to find people who are willing to support and invest in your creative ideas with no expectation of g getting anything in return other than you just being a friend. So I just want to give you your part overall. And um thank you for you know the crackpot because it really helped. Thank you for closing that circle for me.

SPEAKER_02 40:22

Because you know why we're not cracking.

SPEAKER_00 40:24

Right, and just randomly, and I have another one at home, so it's not a big deal, but I'm so glad. Like, yeah, that's so funny. Literally last kid up and killing dragging on time to go back. That's hilarious. That's so funny. So thank you for that, because girl, we might not it may not have ever come to fruition, to be honest. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 40:46

Well, that's why we're here.

SPEAKER_00 40:48

Yeah, so make sure y'all get y'all one of these. This one is thick end, but hopefully it's other people out there. Yeah, yeah. Hopefully this yeah, this kind of stuff like that. We had a lot of fun. It didn't take that much time. I mean, it was over time, but it was just like having a sport and being able to like share those ideas. I mean, that's how I'm trying to figure out like well. We're not gonna waste any time on that because that could be a whole nother podcast situation. Yeah. But you know, they're lost. You know, it's it's enough creative and uniqueness within everyone to do whatever it is that you desire, and it doesn't take away from what somebody else is doing because that's what God gave them, and God gave you something completely. Absolutely. So we're gonna move on. Um, how do you think about legacy when it comes to business? Especially as a black woman creating products rooted in wellness and self-care. Yeah, there's a lot. I mean, there's a lot of little things in there, but like you know, black woman. Yeah, uh I mean you can take the black woman out of there, but you ain't black. No, I know that. No, I agree. No, I'm I'm saying you are creating products. There's a lot of things. So women in business, and I think one of the time that we talk we would are we gonna get get more into that within a business? I don't know. But anyway, so I don't know. But anyway, so I would say that it's like we live we live in a machine and it operates a certain way. And and maybe we don't like it. Some people don't like the way aspects of the way it operates. But the fact is that I go back to the sixth gate. Okay, we did it in sixth gate. All of the default, you know, like you're playing Donkey Kong and the default levels, and like if you go here and then you get here. But it's made to win. Right? We're made to win. So when you say woman, black business Well, I've learned, and I was a tomboy growing up. Like I wanted to climb trees, I didn't like dresses, in another world, they probably could have convinced me in another time and space, I would have been the candidate for like and I'd have been like Where do I come? And it wasn't anything sexual, it was just I so I had to go. I always say when I see I see I'm glad I grew up in that time. No shade to anybody growing up in a later time with other experiences. That's a different thing. But I didn't. And I'm grateful for that because I understood it wasn't that I wanted to be, it just was there was an idea about what a Woman or female was and I didn't fit that mind uh to my my little teacher just have an environment, you know, community, parents, all that kind of stuff. And I wanted to do other things, but I'm in that process of learning myself and being grateful for who I am. I've learned the machine that is the woman in my space, in my own, on my own uh, in my own space, and I've become to understand how to navigate somewhat, how to navigate the world with that, because people see me and immediately again we talk about like just what's physically there. And you can try to pretend, you know, that you're that I I could pretend that I'm seven feet tall, you know what I mean? But that's not what people see when they look at me. They see whatever the height I am, they they gauge me based on that, they see this smaller frame, you know what I mean? Like, and they and they build up ideas behind that. So that's what business I've learned as a black woman in business and legacy is like, okay, first of all, in the business world that is the material business world, okay, by factuals dominated by men. Okay, that's just a fact. Why? Not because I don't think there is some aspect of patriarchy that possibly has pushed women on. But for the most part, plumbing, plane building, road building, the big matter-heavy infrastructure things are things that men do wars, territory. Now, I'm not saying that women aren't involved, but they're not involved as physically involved in that. They are spiritually involved, they are emotionally involved, they are the spouses, they are the sisters, they are the mothers that are raising, you know, caring and raising these men to do this. But men move infrastructure, men move matter, they mean they move heavy things and they create space, okay, that we then go in. So we decorate the space, you know, we make the spaces comfortable. Absolutely. We we say put the light in here, do this here, and that's a whole other we have a whole other foundation about that kind of gender thing. But so as a woman, black in business, what you have to learn is okay, I want to do a lot of stuff. When I go out in the world, what in business, meetings, money, men that own the banks, that control the physical finance, they see me, they see a woman. Immediately, think middle school boys. But I'm passively the young, you know, female teacher that comes in. And I mean and I taught middle school boys, so I know how they how they deal. And so there's just a fine.

unknown 47:05

What do you want?

SPEAKER_00 47:06

Like you know what I want.

SPEAKER_02 47:07

You won't give me the low or it's not like everything, but overall, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 47:15

Like I all the time when I had ideas, oh, you're going, so the fact that we put on some little lipstick and we like you know what I mean, like a little flirtate, you know, you call it whatever. Those are the tools that we have. Those are the tools that if you try to go on, you can go in there and you know, then you're called a bitch, right? And then they're like, all right. But also you need something for me. I'd be like, maybe if you want to be like that, that's fine. But if I'm embracing all that there is that I consider this is my own personal thing, of what it means to be a woman, I don't want to have to knock down all that stuff. I don't want to have to apologize for that. I don't want to have to apologize. I I've told you this before. Oh my god. I'm not apologizing for that. I don't know, period. Yeah, I work here, but I'm gonna need a couple days off. Not mentally there.

SPEAKER_02 48:14

That's not a problem.

SPEAKER_00 48:17

That is part of my machine that is a woman.

unknown 48:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 48:21

And I'm not trying to erase that. So when uh my best deals are made when I'm PMES, we make PMSing. Because when I'm PMSing, I don't know. Oh, you said you standing in your masculine energy for sure. It's like mean business. When I'm PMSing. Well I've been I was sitting in my feminine power, excuse me. But today, my masculine power, and I don't know.

unknown 48:51

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 48:55

But when that's not noticed, right, when people are trying to erase that and say, like, oh, pop a pill, oh, erase that, you know, you don't very with that, you know. Like, you know, that's important, you know what I mean? And so then we had to learn, like, okay, yeah, men generally speaking, it softens the space. Like I tell I I I said this to my in law, I was like, the best thing that men can do because they are so you know physically forceful, okay, and they can, like I said, move at around, is to really understand where the woman is really capable.

SPEAKER_02 49:36

So, like, I'm just an example, like a woman, you might be a man who had a business, and you're with some big um partners or potential deal that's about to make it, you bring your nice, polite wife, and all of a sudden energy is like now you might be able to get a little farther in that business meeting because just because your wife is here, she's not doing anything besides saying, Oh, pregnant.

SPEAKER_00 50:02

Right. So, if you know how to utilize her in that space, it's not like she's not the business deal. The business deal was gonna go with all the men there, just group lions, we're gonna go this way. The wife, the sister, the whatever. Now they're just like, oh, maybe we're gonna, you know, and she's pretty to look at, she's you know, what and whatever. I think her confidence is not about like you have to look idealed a certain way. It's about how you feel you under and the woman knows. She knows it's about herself. She knows if she goes and you know, I need you to talk to talk to this guy. You know what I mean? She knows that. So it's about knowing yourself. So as a woman, black women do this, that's what I kind of kind of learned about. Like, I can have ideas about what I need to be realistic about. Okay, I'm going to a world with other people, and they are looking at me and they are making assumptions, they're making judgments, they are making whatever. How the best way can I navigate around that space so that I'm getting what I want? Not bucking resistant, but just you know. So that's what I would think about like I would think it's kind of like I don't know if you got what I was saying. I got you. Um, how important is it um for you to create products that are rooted in wellness and self-care? Oh, it's uh everything. Yeah, I mean, it's just like it's just digestible. It's just like yeah, I mean, especially I mean, you know, that's a whole other subject too. I mean, we live in a people where we're overconsumed, we are unhealthy, generally speaking, including even aspects of myself. You know, there's just so many things out here that are calling themselves all natural, all natural, healthy, organic, whatever. And and a lot of food, yeah, it's not even food. And it's like, and then people are like blaming and they sh you're making these choices, right? But they are you're being uh seduced and misled, okay, by a b a bigger infrastructure that is guiding uh our purposes and and and keeping us like dumbing us down, you know, to a lot of the things. So, yeah, so to me the whole idea is like, okay, let's get back to basics and because we're we're we're we're not feeling well, you know. Generally speaking, as a human race, people are feeling depressed and they're feeling overburdened and and overwhelmed and a lot of that is based on what you're consuming. Yeah. Internally, yeah, which means what you're eating, um, and also externally, meaning what you're watching and what you're listening to. Um I don't think people are understanding that. I think for me, I think I knew that, but I didn't really believe it. And I think once I started my own healing journey, it was like a light bulb went off. And I was like, oh, so this what them folks were talking about. Okay, got it. You know, and it makes a huge difference. Um so yeah. And it's hard because like even the stuff we're like, look at the stuff in the media today, like uh these Hollywood stars and people, like can you imagine? I'm just gonna say, I don't know, you can publish this, but I mean, like he did it, like I think about anything he was touching, you know what I mean? That you were putting on here and you were dancing to and you were listening to, like that's takes it back to that energy thing. Yes. And so the other thing is is that what I started realizing is even the big factory, you have been making your clothes. Before you had like smaller companies that were, you know, you make your chapstick and you're doing you're doing it with love. I'm gonna receive some of that and I wear your chapstick. It's just because but if you're just in a bathroom, I'm just like, I don't feel you know what I mean? They've got the recipe down, so it's coming out with things, but they're not really the sometimes it's not touching your stuff, it's just their energy. Yeah. And then you find yourself years later and then you figure out, oh my god, there's people like raising kids, and you know, you're like, what? And you're like, no wonder how it's feeling. But that's what as a collective. This is why, because we are not paying close attention to these little things. But I think that's how society was created, created for us to stay present and keep more energy in that's not the whole infrastructure of America. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 54:54

No, no, no. I don't really start going back to like homemade.

SPEAKER_00 55:04

Yeah, and just going back to the city. And that's why you need to make more toxic because I don't know why I make it, but I don't I I don't have the topic on the menu, you know what I mean? So it's like I shouldn't be buying something I don't know. I have a problem with it. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 55:24

Yes, right.

SPEAKER_00 55:31

Right. Don't worry, y'all. Bellabu will be out cheer in the 2026. And then Bella Vu can be a teenager, Bella B to like, you know, yeah. Exactly. So I'm here for it. Alright, so we've supported each other's business for years. What do you think happened when women genuinely invest in each other instead of competing? Um things created the atmosphere shifted. That's how I feel. It's like aligning. Yeah. That's what we're supposed to do. Because I love your products.

SPEAKER_02 56:16

So do I. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 56:22

And frankly, we probably should be working together a lot and often we are. Like that's just like something you just absolutely know that if we were working together a lot more, it would be a lot easier, a lot faster, like that's just a no-brainer. Now, there's little things in there that get, you know, the schedule, it's all the other stuff. Line schedule right that interferes with that connection. But that's what we really need to get back to. And then, you know, even just like what are we doing?

SPEAKER_02 56:57

Why? But we don't stop supporting each other. I think no, we don't, but we do a thing, but we need to be more integrated. Like this is not fun. I mean, it's a lot. Um it's really a lot, but yeah.

SPEAKER_01 57:14

It's a lot.

SPEAKER_00 57:16

I think that's something that we probably can pay our gas though, but we're doing this.

SPEAKER_02 57:22

I feel like I get confused.

SPEAKER_00 57:24

No, really. And I think if you get into business and entrepreneurship, um, just solely based off of money, if that's your foundation, I don't think that you're gonna be successful. Because one, you're not gonna make money right away. You you have to continuously work on your business. You know, there may there may be times when you have to kind of pause on working on your business and maybe focus more on your nine to five. Um, but entrepreneurship to me is not about the money. Um it's never about the money for me. And I'm not saying that I don't desire to have financial abundance. That's not what I'm saying. But for me, it's not about the money. I w I it's about me one being in alignment. Um, two, about me being authentic to who I am. Do I believe in my own products? Do I use my own products? How does that make me feel? You know what I mean? Do I feel like it's a good product? Because I feel like that's important when you are trying to get consumers and customers. If you don't believe in your product and you just selling it to get their money, they're gonna pick up on that energy. You know what I mean? And so for me, mine is not just about the money, it's about ownership. It is about a legacy. That's why I am a co-owner with my daughter, because I want her to have, you know, a business that is gonna be hers someday that she can take over and she can make vulnerable whatever she wants to make it. You know, she doesn't want to make chapstick anymore, and she maybe wants to branch off into whatever her heart desires. You know what I mean? I want to put her in a position to be able to do that. Um, but I think it's really uh important to have supportive friends, whether we are in similar businesses or not. It is never competing for me. Um, it's more of support, it's more of encouragement and creating a safe space where on those days where you feel like, is this shit even really working? Is it even worth my time that you have that friend that's like, nah, it is. You just have it a moment right now. But like, this is your business. It is good. You know, maybe you're not reaching the millions of people that you desire to meet, but think about the reason why you started. You know what I mean? And so for me, I think you know, coming to you and be like, oh, can you make something for me? It's not just you making something for me, but it's almost kind of like me letting you know that I believe in your products. And I say that all the time. I love everything that you make for me. I use them faithfully.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:16

But people be asking, we get that she be making products now. You know, I'm sorry because I'm her friend.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:25

So I don't know if she won't make that physical product for you. But for me, for me, you know, that's different, but definitely, you know, go support my product. Absolutely. I mean, I think we kind of solidify that as our sisterhood grew. You know what I mean? It wasn't I mean, you very well could have been like, girl, how do you make no man recipe? Oh, I make a recipe and I saw chat thing and you do something else. Because you were already, you know, making your own products. Um, and so I think it goes kind of back to that is like when you really see um the essence of who someone is and you really believe in their vision and their business, it's not competing. It's like, this is what I'm doing, this is what you want to do. How can I help you? And then essentially it evolved into us helping each other. Because I have to be on your line. I I still need my shit button. No, I thought about shit. I still need a remote and my facial product. I know, I thought about that as I was getting ready. So I think it it really is important to just have people around who genuinely believe in your business, who are genuinely willing to invest in your business, who are willing to invest in you. Because the business can come and go. But if that is really your sister, you're gonna support them and invest in them regardless. And it's also that's another point that may be a little digressing as well, but like having good people in your co in your in your inner circle. Yeah, I'm starting to believe it's not too many left. I'm bringing all the people that I got, baby. But I'm saying it's like you get sanitized. You got evil. I believe in all that stuff. Like I know the energy is real, so like people and it's not like I'm not scared of it because I already like people like they always want to lean towards the bad stuff, and I'm like, okay, like I went to this like guru Indian guy, and you're all like, oh my god, he's and you know, you do that stuff, and I was like, I'm not worried because I know I have just as much positive energy, so there's nothing that can penetrate this. They may be trying, and I'll recognize when they try. But it is important, you need to be, and it's not walled up per se where you don't let people in, but you are aware that there are evil, disruptive, manipulative, toxic, unhealed. It's like if you lock your door, it's unsafe for you to let those people in once you recognize that. You need to be keen on recognizing that that energy is out there. We are not in the garden of Eden. Following out of there, and you're somewhere what you will, but there are devils everywhere, and devils in heaven anyway. So, yeah. But yeah, I think that's important. Yeah, definitely narrow down and exercise your discernment.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:30

Um, and I think sometimes you just know, but also people's energy can shift over time, which I feel like further reveals that maybe it was never really genuine to begin with. Because I feel like your energy over time can kind of shift. Then what really were your motives? Was it really you just genuinely wanting to get to know me? You know what I mean? Um, but I think it's also just a matter of like having discernment and being more intentional about who you're allowing in your space and all connections are being uh curated, and I feel like that's been all about that. Yeah. Um I always tell people, I see devil. I can see kind of I can have people like they need to like let and I was like, mm, I could be a little over cautious, but that's fine. I'm okay with you like existing. I'm not trying to like go, but I recognize who you are. And in my mind, I'm like, we will never be close. We have to be like that. Right, we will never be close. I just you don't. You know, and like even at my store, like and somebody else recently said that who knows me and was talking to my daughter, who's like, you know, your your your mom's store, there's people who can't come in. I've noticed that. Like there's people who will I've had people who I know regularly who have never set foot in my store. And literally every time they come, they knock on the door, and I have to go to the door to open it for them top. They do not come in. And I know that when people come in, I look as soon as they can I was like, you're looking for you are you have just entered, and I told you this high vibrational area. I know that's right, because we ain't doing no vibration in 2023. You need to be serious, you need to be serious. But also I think it's important to learn how to alchemize your energy. And I don't think people understand that either. People can come around with negative energy, but if you uh one are high vibrating, if you have amazing energy, yeah, then you'll be able to stay in your space that long. And you'll be able to transmute that energy back into something positive. And I think that is my superpower. I think I have experienced. There's a lot of things that have been energy draining. I I attract a lot of energy vampire. Well, they want the light. Yes. But they cannot for light. I'm not walking around telling people this. In my mind, I'm like, you can't have that. They want to tap into the swords. You can't have that. It's like they want to hang on your coat table while you go up and it's like, nah, let me just let the coat off. Right. But yes, it's super important. Yeah, it is. And we're good at this. Yeah. Good at this. And it's good to have friends that are in business. Maybe not even doing the same thing that you're doing, but they're in business. They are entrepreneurs and working on different business adventures. And I think it's it's super important to have um people around you that are just genuinely supportive, and that is no competition. And I feel like if you're trying to compete with me, then yeah, that's not gonna work out. Um, but I think it just takes a certain caliber of woman to be able to navigate through that and understand what that looks like. And for me, if my friend is telling me that they're doing something, I don't give a dang on what you're doing. How can I support you? How can I help you? And it's not to say that you're always going to have the opportunity to do that, but do it as much as you can. How does how is that taken away from whatever I'm doing? It's not. You know, I was talking to one of my friends and she was like, Oh, um, she she said she used the word little and to talk about like having a podcast. And so I let her finish because I didn't want to interrupt her. And so we circled back to it. And I was just like, don't downplay your podcast because I have a podcast. My podcast is unique to me and what I want to talk about. And your podcast would be unique to you and what you want to talk about. I was like, you don't have to say that your podcast is little. I was like, we ain't doing little over here. I was like, it's big podcast energy over here. I was like, you got a podcast, and I got a podcast. And I was like, how can I support you with your podcast? And I understood the the reason behind her making that comment about her podcast being small, because it's like my friend just started a podcast, and I want to support that. But I also too have a concept of some type of podcast that I want to do. But for me, it was important to circle back to that because it's like it's not taking away from what I'm doing. Because what I'm doing is unique to me, and what you're doing is unique to you, even if it is in the same lane, it's still different. You know, and she thanked me for you know saying that and speaking to that. But I'm like, we're friends. You know what I mean? I'm here to support you, you support me. I'm pouring into you, you pour it into me. So I'm like, we're not, it's not a little podcast, it's a big podcast. You know what I'm saying? You it's a big business. You know, people say it's not my small business. It's like words of power. And I ain't doing nothing small in 2026. Everything big and oversized and extra. Okay? And so whatever my friends are doing in regards to their business, yeah, I'm definitely on support. But y'all make sure y'all hit on the option and get y'all some shape out of it because we we in a winter time and we'll need black people out here being ashy. That is true.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:35

That is true.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:36

Alright, so we got one more question before we move into a segment. But if you could leave one piece of wisdom for women who want to build something that lasts, not just a brand, but a legacy, what would it be?

SPEAKER_02 1:09:55

Uh, know that self. That's my drop. No thyself, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:10:03

In every aspect before you go out there and try to be building something as much as you can. Because it's always a learning process. Not overnight. Absolutely. But just be conscious of the little things, you know, stop it from those all overstated statements, but but also real, because I feel like a lot of time in black women we do have these major accomplishments and we don't take time to like sit in that and relish in that. And so like, oh I did that, I was next. Girl, you you just fall in the moment. What do you mean? Like, wait a minute. You know what I mean? And so it it definitely works. Yeah. And somehow you and one way to know yourself is also to see what you create too, like how good you are at something. Like that's what I would say too about business. I sit in my shop and I look around and I see because like you know, you have an idea, like I said, again, I idea that transition from the spiritual to the physical.

SPEAKER_03 1:11:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:08

And every little step, like you always think like on a TV screen, when you're I look I sometimes look at TV and I look at all the things that people aren't paying attention to, like, you know, there's a a glass that's on a table, you know, in just randomly. And then when they were on the thing bag, the glass. Yes. But every somebody said every single thing, even if there's a piece of paper, a pencil, every single thing. And when you are trying to create something, you realize how every little tiny thing is are the little things that go into creating that we think, and how everything is important. And then you learn, really learn what you're back to my me sitting in my shop. I look around and I can see myself, and I can see all the things that no problem, I can do that. And the things that are challenging for me. But also it kind of what it sounds like is like you're in a moment of like reflecting, like how this started to where I am. Right. And how I got to this shop.

SPEAKER_02 1:12:10

Right. And then it's yeah, I do. But I also you tend to pick up those things that you know you can live.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:17

That are easy for you. And then you look around and you're like, when you look at the things that are challenges for your business, those are things that are challenges for you for you. See, yeah, and then you can clearly see them, and you can say, okay, I did all the stuff that was super easy for me to do. That did they were an easy lifts. And now I'm left with the things, and now I've got to confront myself and build up whatever I need to build up because this has to be done, otherwise, we're not gonna have a problem. True. So yeah, so everything that you do, because just by default, you just tend to lift the weight that I think that are easy. Yeah. And I I think to piggyback off of that, I feel like entrepreneurship really reveals who you are. It it forces you to really dig deep and really confront the parts of yourself that are hidden in little space. And so that's what I'm saying about take the opportunity to see what you've done and what you need to work on. Yes. You won't want to look at it necessarily and you'll put it off. But it's not that's the real way you can see. Well, it's well, okay, that's fine. That that that store is gonna sit there until you do whatever you know what you need to do. But it's hard because it's like, okay, now I've got to work, you gotta work on yourself. Yeah, it's like you're working on a business, but you're also working on yourself. It is you, it is you. It is you. But I think it it's your avatar. That's how you need to look at it. It is your avatar. Very true. Yeah. It's almost kind of like mirrors. It's like a mirror. I feel like your business is like a mirror, and not that your business is like holding up a mirror to you, but it's like revealing who you have to become in order for you to continue to maintain. That's all deep. But it's very true because I think it requires you to have a certain level of discipline. Yes. Absolutely. It just requires it. It just it demands because without that, you're not going to get far. No. As a matter of fact, it's not about beating yourself down, it's just the way it works. Howsoever. Before you can even get there, you one have to believe in your vision understand the confidence of you starting a business in the beginning. Confident. And then just start because I will uh perfection this way out of even starting anything creative. I need to like, I need to have all this thing. Yeah, and I think it's more so of us looking at other people who've probably been doing it way longer than you, and you're looking to them like, oh, well, they're there, but we don't know the sacrifices that they can to get there. And really just procrastinate because you know this is just a challenge, and you need to just say it. This is a challenge for me. It's a huge challenge. This is a challenge for me, but I'm putting it, this is what I do. I'm putting it on my list. I know I am, like you said, and you'll call it, of course, because you're trying to be nice to yourself. I'm a perfectionist, I gotta get everything right, I gotta you just don't want to just start because you you're more concerned about what it looks like. Yeah. And I think that is also doing itself a disservice because it's never gonna look how it's supposed to look to other people. Right. It's not about that. Yeah. One, it's about how it feels to you and then how it looks. Right. Because if you really wholeheartedly believe in whatever it is that you're creating, then that's all that matters. Yeah. It's not gonna be perfect, and you're going to evolve as an entrepreneur over time, meaning you're going to learn from mistakes, you're going to fail. You're going to be like, Yeah, I ain't doing this no more. You're going to take some breaks, you're going to pause. But I think if it's solely based on your passion and your purpose, and you have a clear vision about why you wanted to be an entrepreneur in the first place, you will circle back and you'll realize, okay, I didn't do this right, let me do it different this way. And that doesn't mean that that's going to equal you get into the millions right away either. But you're coming back with a better understanding of your why and your purpose. And I think if you lose your purpose and your why as an entrepreneur, then it doesn't mean that it's completely over. It just means that you need to pause and maybe recalibrate and come out with a new vision and then get back to it. But yes, entrepreneurship will definitely um be all ofin your business. I think you know, we put it in a category, I think entrepreneurship, but these things apply to, like you said, revelationship, your kids, your reveals who you are. You're growing in entrepreneurship, you're growing within yourself. Yes. Like you as a person involving. And sometimes it's scary. It is very scary. Sometimes you feel like I don't I don't think I can do it. My idea really, like, is it me? Yeah, it's just like no, it's you. It's you. I gave you that idea. Make it a plan.

SPEAKER_02 1:17:37

You're like right.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:44

So yes, it's it is very scary. Not even a it's yeah, it's not even we just got real. But it's it is that. And that's why people take a drink. And it's like literally, don't just like they're been not like, yeah, a needle? Like, what is it? I just need to like just something. But yeah, nope, not coming. It's it's all there's nobody coming to save you. Oh, that part.

SPEAKER_02 1:18:13

And nobody comes to save you.

SPEAKER_00 1:18:16

And when you realize it, you're like, the only person that's gonna save you is you. And let me tell you something. I even told my kids this might sound harsh. And I told my students this, and off the record, I tell them, Morgan State, you know, but let me tell you something. Anytime you fit, I'm like, there is always a tall building that you can jump off of. That's option. That's an option. People do it. We don't mean literally. No, no, no, no. But I'm just saying, don't act like you're imprisoned because there are some people who are just like, you know what? I can't take it anymore. I'm done. Don't sit here and be like, you know, choose, celebrate that win. I choose not to do that. So that means I choose to live. That means I choose to be a part of the process. So get your ass up and do it. Because you can always end it if you want. True. And you can always not start and watch somebody else start the very thing that you had a vision for. Yeah. And I feel like that's worse. You sitting on a creative idea that could be successful. You sleep on it because you're too scared or you thought it's gotta be perfect, or you whatever it may be. And then you look up, and the same creative idea that you had, somebody else had it and they took it and ran with it. And I think now it's successful. And you know what I think? I think that ideas just because they're energy, they travel. Like once you think about it, you got mmm, you thought it was. And then somebody else can pick it up.

unknown 1:19:50

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:51

For sure. Yeah. Or, you know, you overshare them. Right.

SPEAKER_02 1:19:57

And you can work that's not the blueprint, and I'm gonna run it back.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:02

But hey, just think, you know what I mean? Like you did it before I did it. It's all out of life lessons here. Again, it's not just entrepreneurship. It's entrepreneurship and life lessons.

SPEAKER_02 1:20:14

Right.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:15

Exactly. Yep. Yep, yep, yep. It's so fun. Well, before we move on, we're gonna step into a new segment I'm introducing this season called Grounded in Gratitude. This is where we slow down the conversation and honor the truth that even in our most challenging seasons, the building seasons, the uncertain seasons, the stretching seasons, there is still something to be grateful for. Being grounded in gratitude isn't about ignoring what's hard, it's about choosing to participate. I'm sorry, choosing to appreciate what you have, what you've survived, and what you're becoming, even while you're still in the process. So, Najma, I'd love for you to share with us how do you stay grounded in gratitude, especially during seasons where ownership, legacy, and growth felt the most challenging. Um, I think when I think, okay, I know. What I've learned is that you always have to go back to what you have. Don't ever think that you don't have a children. There are times when you know you're being a channel that there are some others.

SPEAKER_02 1:21:28

Just get in the car and decide.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:31

I could do that. So if I'm having such a hard time, don't think that you have to be, you have to do, because people do all sorts of things. You don't have to. So if you in that moment decide you're not gonna you're having a hard time with your kids, you're having a hard time, and you're not gonna get in the car and go with Mexico and disappear. Then honor that truth. And say I choose not to do that. I don't force to, unless you're in a prison somewhere, you know what I mean? Like there are some people who get, you know, who are locked up. But they also too had a choice. Yeah, they had a choice. Yeah. Now they live in the common. And even in a prison, you have a choice to like I thought about that. And I'm like, even in the prison, you have a choice to not follow the rules, and then maybe some guy will shoot you, and then that'll be the that's their choice. You know what I mean? Like, you don't have to do anything you don't want to do, and you need to understand that you're not being forced, you're shooting. And that choice may be very reasonable, maybe very like that's the better choice. You should stay home and be a mom. You know what I mean? Like that's the better shape. Or you should rest, or you should do whatever. But don't ever try the gratitude is understanding you can't choose. Absolutely. You come to the world with options. Once you get to real, I think before then you're a baby, you don't even know your options, you don't even know you're alive, you don't even remember. And you get old enough, but once you're old enough to recognize and I tell I mean there are 12-year-olds who love abusive homes who are living on the street. But you know, you get I had abusive background and I chose it 12 not to be that. And I didn't want to live on the street.

SPEAKER_02 1:23:15

But there's some who do. And they're out here in the street. But they're fit.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:21

But they give me a wrong. Exactly. So I think that's the thing that we often don't think of. We think about as a victim like we don't have a choice. You have a choice though. So and that's what I I tell myself, and they're grateful for the choice. You know what I'm saying? So now it's like now I'm taking ownership. So I choose to be here with my kids. I choose to be at this job. I choose to be because you you don't have to have a job either. There are plenty of people who don't have jobs who are sitting on corners and just begging for money. That's a life you can have. If you choose not to do that, that's probably a better choice. But just honor that choice. And sit in that and just say, now you're taking ownership of your life. So what else do you choose to do? Not because someone's forcing you and making you even obligation or family, you know what I'm saying? That's a big one. Yeah, like you can say it's their fault, but check me on them because they're making you feel like you have to.

unknown 1:24:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:18

You don't actually have to. You ain't gotta do nothing. You don't do nothing, you don't. But I think that's also something that's important to you because choices are exactly we're considering what's back from the house, right? Yeah. And it's like, well, if you choose to say, well, it's better for me to listen to my mother and deal with like the fact that my family says that this could be, you know, you know, wearing hijab or whatever, I wear hijab. You choose that. So be grateful that you have that choice, honor that choice, don't have fire remorse, buyer's remorse over that choice, because then you start beating yourself up shit. And you wind yourself up into a whole situation of just continuously doing things that you feel like are failing and you beating yourself up about it, and you just become the most horrible person ever. You feel guilty, you feel like I'm worthless. And you feel like you're not living, because at that point you're not. Yeah, you're not choosing what's right for you. And that's ungrateful. Because you're not taking advantage of the wide world and all the choices that God gave me. That's to me being ungrateful. And grateful is that no, I choose to be here. I want to be here, I choose to be here. It's hard. You know what I mean? I don't feel like doing all the work that it takes necessarily, but obviously I do because if I didn't, then I just wouldn't do it. So I just choose hard stuff. And every choice that you made initially is not gonna always feel good. No. I think that's the thing too. I think people think, okay, I made this choice. And I feel like I want to feel amazing. And it's like, no, it's not gonna feel that way initially. You may be you may have some grievances about it, you may feel sad. Um, but you will eventually see that that was maybe the best choice. Or maybe the worst choice. Well, it's the worst choice, and you learn from it, but you don't you just say, Okay, I learned from that.

unknown 1:26:25

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 1:26:26

Isn't that great? I mean, when you talk about it, it feels like that sounds like so much fun. No, but then we can't then we can just do it. But I think it's hard to you gotta be in a good space with yourself. I think for me, I made a lot of choices that benefited other people, but did not benefit me and did not feel good to me. But I also feel like sometimes us honoring ourselves is something that we have to learn. You know what I mean? I don't think I was I was taught that, you know, growing up. Like, it's not about you know how that person feels. What how do you feel about that? And if you don't feel comfortable with doing that particular thing with that person, then don't do that. Yeah. Like honor yourself. I think that's something that has to be taught. So I feel like for me now, oh I'm like, oh yeah, capacity, capacity, no, and no, and uh I'm not checking and absolutely not, and no, like it, you know what I mean? But also I feel like that just comes with you having life experiences and wisdom over time, realizing like a lot of people really just played in my face, but also flipping it back to you, like they played in my face because I allowed it to play in my face because I wasn't in a place where I was honoring myself first. You know what I mean? Because we can put it on other people all the time. But then it just reverts back to you, like, okay, they did that, but then like, what did you do? Why do nothing? Well, and that's how the cookie crumples.

unknown 1:27:58

So, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:27:58

And I'll tell you where that's. So you come from like a childhood that's like horrible and you're like but it's like you gotta stand up to yourself yourself. You still I'm scared of myself in the same in the same way that somebody who didn't have it. Yeah. That's sobering. It's like I don't get like a break because no. Like you I see that you take second week, you know, for the past six months. Let me give you the rest of the year off. Why don't we go on breaking back at me? It doesn't happen and it's so sobering, like to understand that. But then you get in the game, and like I said, it helps with having people, you know, and then just you know, just guys, we're not we're not in the garden even that's gonna be a good thing. No, we in the ghetto for real. We're literally like in the princes. So it's literally a done survivor. Oh, I get it. It's very happy. It's important of having supportive friends who genuinely love. And over the moments of heaven. Like we go get it out, Adrian.

SPEAKER_01 1:29:05

We we might agree.

SPEAKER_00 1:29:07

Yeah, we've got to be. I can just figure out how to get us out of this dimension and into a battle. We're building it. We are building it. This dimension? Yeah, and we're getting smarter with every move. And not it. We're getting smarter with every move. Oh my god. But thank you so much for sharing that. That is a good grounded ingratitude. If I had to um do a grounded ingratitude, I would say that don't look at things as like definite or forever. Um just because you had a bad moment or maybe a bad experience does not equal a bad life. And I think, and I'm just taking from my experience, I feel like when you start flowing with life instead of going against the grain of life, you look at things different, which shifts your experience when things don't go as how maybe you thought they should go. Um, and I think for me that's where I stay grounded in my gratitude. Because I'm going with the flow of life, not against it. So when things arise, it's not necessarily me, you know, causing those things to arise, but those things are not gonna last forever. And you kind of just have to learn how to coast through the challenging times. And so that's how I stay grounded in my gratitude. I stay thankful. And you know how I see that you've produced that? I look around in the home that I'm in, and like I said, I know some of the challenges that you go through, which is like, you know, but you have produced a family that is together, children that are respectful, you know what I mean? Like that's something you produce. I'm not taking anything with that with their hands, but I hope I think that's like you look around and there's a peace, there's a joy, there's a comfort that is unstakable and un and and recognizable and what is it? What's the word pal p I pallive?

unknown 1:31:29

I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 1:31:29

But anyway, but you can taste it, you know what I mean? Like so that's something that doesn't come like I said, you weren't like anointed, you know what I mean? That was so based off of choices. Yeah, you chose certain paths, and this is what has come with that. And it feels good, and it looks good, and it's beautiful, and it's you know, yeah, absolutely. Yeah, I'm gonna learn to kind of sit in some bit more. Like you did a lot of things. Yeah. So yeah, thank you for that. Well, moments like these are exactly why this exists because gratitude reminds us that even in the middle of building, stretching, and becoming, we are already standing on something meaningful. Being grounded in gratitude isn't about having everything figured out, it is about honoring your journey, the lessons, and the resilience that got us here. And I hope everyone listening takes a moment to reflect on their own wins, big or small, because legacy isn't only what we leave behind, it is also how we show up today. So, Fat Family, thank you for spending this time with us and leaning into a conversation about ownership, legacy, and what it truly means to build something that lasts. Najra, please let us know how we can support you, where we can follow you to get your pink walnut product. Okay, so um the website is pinkwalnutbistro.com, which I got up actually over this right that I relaunched it. Um, relaunch? Yeah. Don't skip off that. Yes, exactly. I feel really good about that. I've been down for a while. But um, and then uh I'm a break and water space that's on 36 months on Avenue. Um my look on the website, look at the phone number, and call. It's a little ghetto in terms of the times I'm there. I typically open Monday, Wednesday, Friday. But sometimes things come up. Absolutely. Exactly. Yeah, so I don't wanna I I've been I've been uh thrashed for like uh lack of some somewhat lack of consistency. But anyway, I'm working on that 2026 as AJ rocking this 2026. So um and then and then on the Facebook and Instagram at Pink Wanna Nistro. Yeah, we'll be showing you link everything. Yeah. People can follow you and support. Yeah, definitely. Because don't just be following support. Go go to the the brick and mortar, go get your conversation. Come in and have a conversation. Come in, get your product made, chitty share all the things. Okay. So if this episode spoke to you, make sure you leave a review and share it with someone who's walking boldly into their next chapter. No, everybody got anything to say before we roll out. I don't know. This is wonderful. Yeah. And actually, I look at the time and I'm like, really? We're only gonna have a day for something. Yeah, not the life. But I mean, I think what we usually get together is usually how conversations. All right, fab fam, as long as you have breath in your body, you have purpose. So use each day as an opportunity to share your light and never forget how fab you are. Until next time, stay bold, stay grounded, and keep building the life you deserve. And we out.